Yesterday, I got in touch with an old friend who I hadn't spoken with in years. We used to be tight, but like a lot of friendships, years have passed. Through a falling out, a misunderstanding or just other responsibilities, many of us have put our old friendships on the backburner.
We spoke like we used to as if time never passed and I had to admit I was very satisfied when it was through. It all has to do with connections. Those things that you never expect anything will come of and suddenly you are wrapped up in someone else's life and they in yours. Through six years of sharing our hearts, we had experienced all levels of emotion and still stood by one another when we could stand.
Unfortunately, time does pass and expectations aren't met and disappoints left in permanent ink still mark our psyches. It was nice to connect for a few moments and wash away all those marks, but when the glee wears off there is always the now and the life that goes along with it.
After we spoke, I made sure to catch a new show. I am not one for reality TV, but this one seemed right up my alley. More to Love caught my imagination and I have to admit these plus-size girls really looked great. It was actually inspiring. After the conversation that elevated my ego, this show really brought to life what I have recently experienced.
Being a bigger girl, though I have never seen myself in a bad light until I was forced to look through someone else's eyes, I know what it is like to be passed over when looking for love. A lot of the ladies voiced some thoughts I have had like hanging out with other beautiful women so the chunky one gets passed over. I admit, I hang out with a lot of very gorgeous women and yet most of the time when I am out with them, I'm not looking to hook-up just to share in their companionship.
And I wonder if that is the reason why me and BP never worked it out. I never thought of it until I realized that there are shallow men out there who get embarrassed when their lady isn't a size 2. I always figured it was a flaw with the man and it is. Now I wonder.
Well I will continue on my quest to get healthy, but I will never be a size 2 and I don't want to be since I love to eat wonderful food. Why give up your pleasures just to please someone else? Not me, never again.