Friday, January 17, 2014

The Treasure of Saying No

Just as valuable as saying “Yes” is saying “No”. Regretting the “Y” word is so much worse than saying “No” since everyone knows you mean no and instead you said yes so when you say yes again they are wondering if you really mean no.

Know what I mean?

Be honest with yourself and those around you and say “No” when you mean “No”. “No I can’t be on a tenth committee at school.” “No, I can’t make 10 dozen cupcakes for the bake sale fundraiser.” “No I can’t do Children’s Time during the service.” (That last one is mine.)

I believe the worse curse phrase in the world is “I can’t” but when it comes to your sanity and your happiness, it’s not a curse but a blessing. Example: I was asked to do Children’s Time during our church service. This is about 5 minutes of sharing a lesson with about 4 wee ones who have the attention span of 10 seconds. Since I am not an expert at teaching such little ones stories about the Bible (it’s hard since I have a different interpretation than most) and I don’t know how to make some of these lessons relevant for such little kids, I opted out when asked. A simple, “No I don’t think so” was good enough and a “sorry” to follow let the person know that it wasn’t a good idea for them or I to do this task.

Yes there was some disappointment, but that was more easily dismissed than if I would have said “Yes”, regretted each letter 10-fold and hated those 5 minutes.

We are taught to be martyrs and say “Yes” even when it is detrimental to ourselves and those we love. There’s a fine line between feeling out of a comfort zone and feeling put upon.

We all have our reasons to say no once in a while, and it’s OK. It makes saying yes so much more fulfilling.

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